Mods are in the US :)

I'm super excited as the drug I've ordered is now in the States about to pass customs. If all goes well I will have Modafinil in under 2 weeks. I can hardly wait. Literally....

Work has just been so tough that I really feel like I need it. And I'm not sure if I should be getting off coffee, especially since recently I've been getting larger and larger sized cups.

That said, I don't mind my job. Customer interaction face-to-face and over the phone is limited and that's a big plus.

The job has it's ups and downs but recently it's been a lot of downs. Today, for instance,  was a stressful day from the get-go as our duties increased and I had 70 emails waiting for me when I started. I had some energy in the morning and was going through my tasks ok, until after about 2 or so when I didn't feel like doing anything at all. I just wanted to leave.

And this all got me thinking how I don't really give a shit about this job and what is really important to me is comedy and that is what I should really use the Modafonil for. If I focused on Comedy at least on weeknights I could really go far with it and have something to show for it in a few months at least.

Other than that I found that if I don't go online when I eat dinner, I tend to at least get some things done.. and afterwards I feel much better and am more motivated to keep doing things. I guess it's something to consider. No internet until after dinner and tasks. I'll try it and see how it goes.. :)

Background

I feel the need to start recording my journey before I actually start taking Modafonil. This is not only for comparison purposes of "medicated vs non-medicated" but also to set clear goals before I start taking the drug and to have a foundation of good habits. As much as I want to believe that Modafinil is NZT48 in real life, there ain't no such thing. Having a plan of action in place will help me get the most out of the drug.

A bit about myself:

Early thirties. Underachiever, which is the biggest source of my insecurity. Notorious Procrastinator. Notice the capital P. I also have ADHD. Never been properly diagnosed because it's expensive, but I just know. I get bored to the point of narcolepsy unless I'm enthralled by something. I get frustrated/annoyed easily. Daydream constantly... etc, etc

What I'm hoping Modafonil will help me with:

Day-to-day life: Focusing at work, making fewer mistakes. Having energy to do things after work. Not take naps during weekends.

Professional life: Hoping I will work really hard on what I really want to do for a living - comedy. I'm hoping to make a living out of it.

In a nutshell: I don't think Modafinil will help me figure out what I want to do with my life, but rather help me focus, and help me GET SHIT DONE.

Things I will work on this week: Every day after dinner, make a list for the next day: one important task and additional tasks I want to accomplish. Ask myself: what is more important?